So, tell me, GI: Who's Jodie Foster screwing now, bitte?
Posted: Thu Aug 27, 2009 9:48 am
Late winter, 1984
When Ronald Reagan gets wind that Ted Kennedy is thinking about reviving the Kennedy off Broadway production of Camelot, he takes no chances...
The Oval Office
President Reagan invites John Hinckley for a box lunch.
"...In conclusion John, after reviewing your case, I have decided to grant you a full pardon."
"But, Mister President...I...I shot you."
"I believe in redemption, John. Plus, I'm told your parents are stalwart Missouri Republicans. Full pardon. And as a presidential souvenir, I am returning the pistol that you shot me with. Someday, you may be able to cash in on it at one of those high class auctions or one of those gun shows."
"No strings attached, Mister President? says Hinckley.
"No strings, John. But there is one thing you should know...Ted Kennedy is screwing Jodie Foster."
January 1993
The Oval Office
President Bush invites John Hinckley for a box lunch.
"...John, there is one thing you should know...Ross Perot is screwing Jodie Foster."
January 2001
The Oval Office
President Clinton and Vice President Al Gore invite John Hinckley for a box lunch.
"John, I have to step out for a quickie," says President Clinton. "Vice President Gore would like a word with you. Thanks for showing up."
"John," says VP Gore. "There is something you should know...Ralph Nader is screwing Jodie Foster."
January 2009
The Oval Office
President Bush invites John Hinckley for a box lunch.
"John, there is something you should know," says President Bush. "Dick Cheney is screwing Jodie Foster...And so is Donald Rumsfeld, Paul Wolfowitz, George Tenet, Douglas Feith, David Addington..."
When Ronald Reagan gets wind that Ted Kennedy is thinking about reviving the Kennedy off Broadway production of Camelot, he takes no chances...
The Oval Office
President Reagan invites John Hinckley for a box lunch.
"...In conclusion John, after reviewing your case, I have decided to grant you a full pardon."
"But, Mister President...I...I shot you."
"I believe in redemption, John. Plus, I'm told your parents are stalwart Missouri Republicans. Full pardon. And as a presidential souvenir, I am returning the pistol that you shot me with. Someday, you may be able to cash in on it at one of those high class auctions or one of those gun shows."
"No strings attached, Mister President? says Hinckley.
"No strings, John. But there is one thing you should know...Ted Kennedy is screwing Jodie Foster."
January 1993
The Oval Office
President Bush invites John Hinckley for a box lunch.
"...John, there is one thing you should know...Ross Perot is screwing Jodie Foster."
January 2001
The Oval Office
President Clinton and Vice President Al Gore invite John Hinckley for a box lunch.
"John, I have to step out for a quickie," says President Clinton. "Vice President Gore would like a word with you. Thanks for showing up."
"John," says VP Gore. "There is something you should know...Ralph Nader is screwing Jodie Foster."
January 2009
The Oval Office
President Bush invites John Hinckley for a box lunch.
"John, there is something you should know," says President Bush. "Dick Cheney is screwing Jodie Foster...And so is Donald Rumsfeld, Paul Wolfowitz, George Tenet, Douglas Feith, David Addington..."